Why Are You Telling Me This #3: Death

February 15, 2012

I swear – I work with the craziest people.  Today, the topic has shifted from Love to Death.  Seriously, death, funerals, and life insurance.  Why are you telling about what you want after you die?

First of All, when you die, you are dead.  You truly have no influence on what your family does to you.  Just because you say, “do this!” — doesn’t mean they are going to do it.  Second of all, I don’t need life insurance right now.  Quit telling me to get it.  I need to do things like pay rent – you know, something that helps me out when I am ALIVE.  Third, if you want to be cremated, why would you tell your family to rent a coffin for your viewing?  What kind of sense does that make?

Why? Why? WHY are you telling me about your death?!  I don’t even like you… I probably won’t go to your funeral.  I don’t want to know the particulars of your will.  I am probably already dead, anyway, because this is hell.

Advertisements

Inappropriate Time to Laugh #4: My Inner Humologue

December 1, 2011

So, I have had the giggles ALL DAY.  Why you ask?  I have a completely inappropriate piece of a song stuck in my head.

My boss has come over to ask me questions, and I can’t help but hear the creepy, dirty, and overall workplace inappropriate lyrics looping in my head.  It makes me want to hum or sing the lyrics out loud, but I am pretty sure I would get fired.  This seems to be a typical issue for me.  Some songs that have been previously stuck in my head:

-Cee Lo Green: F*ck You
-Reggie Watts: Fuck Shit Stack
-Macklemore: And We Danced
-SNL: Like a Boss

Today, however, the source of my true amusement is….. The Ghostbusters Theme Song.  Some might say, “Well, that song is innocent enough.”  Not the part I have in my head….